June 23, 2005 :: Say my name, say my name

Warning: This post may be perceived as arrogant. Proceed at your own risk.

As I have mentioned many times in the past, I have a lot of female friends. A good number of them have boyfriends or are dating what I will call "significant others" - men with whom they are practically but not nominally exclusive. Same difference, for the purposes of this discussion. I have noticed that, strangely, a good number of them don't refer to their S.O.s by name when speaking to me about them. I don't mean that they use nicknames; I mean they consistently refer to him as "him" or "mister mayun" or sometimes just "my dude". And I mean that they don't necessarily use this language to address him directly or toward other people.

As usual, I have a theory about this.

Now, let me preface this next paragraph with this statement: I do not believe every woman wants to sleep with me. Far from it. I think I do alright, though. At least a 7 out of 10.

OK, here goes the theory: I think the women who don't refer to their S.O.s by name do so subsconsiously because they are open, on some level, to a romantic relationship with me. In many cases, that is a remote or farfetched possibility, for various reasons, not all of which have to do with my famed pickiness. But so far (re-checking the mental checklist), the theory holds true.

I think men probably do this too, although I don't have any anecdotal evidence to back this up. Do you think you speak about your S.O. differently to someone for whom you hold a torch than for someone who really truly is just a friend? And will these so-called friends disappear if I get married (which, I admit, is a dicey gamble) and the torches get extinguished? These are the things I wonder.

posted by Rainmayun at 3:09 PM -