June 01, 2004 :: Tuesday Casserole

If I haven't already explained (and I'm too lazy to go back and check)... I do these rambling type posts as a sort of brain dump. Everything that's on my mind, most of which usually isn't enough to warrant a post on its own, gets shoved into one of these, in the same way that an HBCU cafeteria will shove all the week's leftover chicne roasts and rice and deli cheese and steamed vegetables and God knows whatever else into a Friday afternoon casserole. Delicious! Enjoy...

I don't usually put people's real names in my blog posts, but I had to for this one. Who in the hell names their child Velvet? That is so clearly a stripper name, and on top of that the poor child just took the MCAT and is trying to get into med school. Would you take your kids to see Dr. Velvet Jones for a checkup? She's going to have to use a first initial or something.... V. Anastasia Johnson or whatever. Poor child. It doesn't help that she has a slightly west-coast sounding ghetto twang (she grew up in Oklahoma). She's reasonably smart, but she's going to have a hard time getting people to take her seriously.

Public Service Announcement - Signs that you're in friend zone, or worse:

•	He tells you about other dates he's going on.
•	He routinely agrees in principle to hang out with you, but then you always get pre-empted.
•	He doesn't return your phone calls.
•	He drank the champagne that was supposed to be your birthday present with another girl, several months later.

I know I'm getting old now. My liver just doesn't work the same way it used to. I am going to try an experiment... no liquor for the month of June. Wine only. This should be interesting.

Any formerly-respectable happy hour that advertises itself as "THE DETAILS:
Featuring the 'Chronicles of Riddick' starring Vin Diesel, and featuring Ja Rule Happy Hour" deserves to be firebombed with molotovs made out of whatever the hot, trendy new vodka is... Level, or Ciroc. Overproof. With Burberry pocket squares for fuses.

Memo to southern European and Middle Eastern foreigners who like to go to black clubs: we as a people place a high value on the use of deodorant. It won't matter how much money you're dropping at the bar if she's dropping at the bar because of your malodorous trail wafting across the club.

posted by Rainmayun at 12:12 PM -

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